entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
