P.S. I can't hear my feet
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
