I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
