You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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