I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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