Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
