what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
