It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
