you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
