My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
