I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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