My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Randomize
