Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
This show inspires me to have sex in space
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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