Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
