listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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