well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
