I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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