This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
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