Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
