My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
