butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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