i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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