What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
