Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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