He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
