I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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