definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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