Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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