Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
