he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
