porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
