out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
do herpes really smell.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
