i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
