You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
