we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
