Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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