I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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