nut hugger
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
