Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
