I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
