That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
This house was built for laser tag.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize
