Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
