You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Alive.
So much puke
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
