Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
