R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
