This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Randomize