I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
