Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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