Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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