don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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